edits back

...................... i respected you-
I never named you as the father
I don't badmouth you to your daughter
I don't say you are dead

I leave truth and space

I  never spoke words against her
I wished you both well

you can hate me
and mentally punish me
for keeping our daughter

but stop recording songs-
writing songs
that call me out of my name

take me off your radar
as you have already done so for your daughter

hate is thicker than blood.

grow up.

and give me the same
adult respect
I have already given you.

If you want to call
the mother
of your unwanted bastard
a bitch, a rat, or trash,
at least
don't do it on a microphone.

Can you, at least, give me that much back?

I Kept You

Because I loved you all my life.
When sun was the only touch I trusted,
 I loved you.
When violence was the dinner I fed on,
I loved you.
When blood championed fools
And banished love and perseverance,
I loved you.
I loved you enough to wait,
While women scrambled like they were
Meal-ticket-Easy-rider-pride-booster -self-esteem-pusher-doll-notion-man-traps,
I waited.
And I was alone,
With my love for you.
I tried to get ready,
But I was climbing backward escalators.
I tried to make nests,
But he never came or
Never stayed or
Never stayed without violence.
I love you enough to know I still don't have enough.
But you're coming.
And I'm scrambling to hide All the sorrow I'm trudging through,
All that I've failed to do.
But you're coming.
And no matter what comes,
I kept you because,
My whole life,
You were my greatest wish,
My biggest dream,
My constant desire.
I kept you, Because, I have waited my whole life for you.